What have I done?

Can't figure out what I have done to stop the weight loss... but I know it can't possibly be the food I'm stuffing in my face! Heck no, half of that food is twice as much as I need!! LOL I have no idea why I have no freakin' control lately, I try as I might but it seems like these last few weeks I can't keep food out of my hands. Sweet, salty, spicy, cheesy.... I just want to eat and I can't seem to stop! Am I pregnant? I don't think so, need a partner for that don't ya? Enough is enough, I need to stop stuffing shit down my pie hole and get off my ass. The cold weather doesn't help! I don't want to be out in the dark and the cold doing much, but It needs to be done, and when I can show a net loss for the week, I will be happy, but right now I have been on a climb, and it needs to stop!

the fall continues...

The falling weight that is!! Yes indeed, I am now down 40 pounds. It seems like a huge amount when you think about it, but it barely scratches the surface of what I wish I could get rid of. The good news is that I am nearly halfway to my goal. I stepped onto the scale this morning not knowing what to expect, because it has been a weird week, and I haven't gotten in all of my wanted exercise time, but I have been busy and doing physical labor, so I guess it has been a wash.

I have been taking great pains during the regular week to stay away from certain things, but in order to keep myself from binging out of control I use from dinner time on Saturday night through dinner time on Sunday as my " have some of the good stuff" time, and today I treated myself to some chips and dip! So far my method has been working, and I will continue with what I am doing, despite all of the unsolicited advice I seem to be getting from so many well wishers!

I ran into a friend at the store today while I was buying my Chips and dip, and He was happy to hear that I had made such progress, and being in quite good shape Himself, he immediately started to make suggestions for me. I appreciate the thought, and that you are trying to help, but I have found a system that is working quite well for me, and I plan to stick to it for as long as it takes to accomplish my goal, and possibly more if I think I can continue doing so. I doubt that I will ever again see the underside of 200#, but that said, if I can continue at the pace that I am going I really could achieve my goal before the summer is finished. I have found a system that I have been able to stick with, and it works well for me. I am feeling better each day, and my energy is increasing also. I find that the more I do, the better I feel later. It is truly encouraging.

Sizes....

Not the size of my.. never mind, I mean clothing sizes and food sizes! You have a dirty mind!!

Ok this comes up for a couple of reasons, first of all I just bought a brandy new pair of rollerblades. Yes, the fat boy loves to skate, but I haven't done it in a few years, one of the reasons is that I haven't had a good fitting pair of skates. So I went to the sporting good store and looked around, but I wasn't happy with what was there, and they didn't have any sizes in stock that would approach being a good fit. So I went online. Using the information that I had gained from looking in the store, and the charts on the website I found a style that I liked that was available in a size that should fit me. I ordered them. 125 bucks!! Yikes, but hey, I need the fitness that they can provide. Exercise is key to my losing weight. ( that and not eating as much! ) The skates arrive and I try them on, they seem a little bit snugger than I really wanted, but I guessed that maybe they needed to be to provide the proper support. I couldn't stay on my feet in them for more than 10 minutes. And after that initial pain set in, the interval dropped to about 5 minutes. So now I have to go through the trouble of sending them back and ordering the next size up. I hope these ones fit better, because it's the largest size available in that style. If these don't fit, I may have to find a specialty shop and make a few phone calls. Being a fat guy, I have fat feet, but I think that this size change should make the difference for me. I hope!

Why do sizes vary so much? My shoe size is truly a 10 wide, but in many cases there is no wide available, so I have to step up to a size 11 or sometimes even 12 to get the needed width. Is it so unreasonable to expect the availability of a descent size range? I can't possibly be the only person who has this problem. I mean as the American ass spreads, don't the feet spread too? They have to hold up so much more weight, it makes sense that they would need to be wider to disperse the forces of gravity! I mean, have you walked through a WalMart in the warm weather and seen the huge legs poking out of the stretchy shorts? Sure, you notice the fat-ass wedgies, but also that the shoes all look like their about to burst like a sausage on a grill trying to hold in a fat foot! You may also notice that most of them are Velcro closed too, but the fact that fat people can barely bend over long enough to tie their shoes is also beside the point! LOL Seems like other things have expanded with the population's guts, why not shoes and theater seats?

As I am losing weight I am looking towards buying some new pants. Maybe not a lot right away, but some at least, to get me through the transitional phases. Right now I'm down one size and about a half. So I am wearing stuff that I haven't been able to wear comfortably in well over a year. It's kinda nice, but it drives me nuts that I buy the same size pants from three different companies and they all fit different. I have one pair that the legs drag on the ground and the waist is almost a full size smaller than the same sized pair of Levi's. Oh well I guess I don't mind having the problem of finding a smaller pair of pants!! LOL

And what about McDonald's? A regular size french fries is now what was once called a large, and a large is a super-size, and what is now called super-size is enough fries to feed an entire family! what was once a "regular" is now considered a child size and is relegated to the Happy Meal. Have you seen one of those 64 oz coffee mugs that some of the donut chains are selling? 64 oz of coffee is more than the average home coffee pot can brew at one time!! Who needs that much coffee and why? That is a worse sign of addiction than needles and spoons! Good lord, it's no wonder people are peeing in odd places these days. When you see someone carrying around a grande coffee cup you know that they are gonna have to pee sooner rather than later and when the urge hits, there will be nothing stopping the flow! The super size soda bottles and cups from the burger joints are enough to weigh down an armored truck, and people drink the whole damn thing! I know, I used to be one of those people. It's killing them and they are happy to do it. Oh well, I'm not their babysitter. I will watch and comment.

Eat up, we need a few less people anyway!

Less of a man...

I like being less of a man!! Yes there is now 30 pounds less of me! I was at the doctors office today and my official weight is 300 pounds less than it was a mere 6 weeks ago! I am so freaking happy! I am once again fitting into pants and shorts that I haven't been able to wear in nearly a year. That is way cool, and Good results are encouraging! Notice all the exclamation marks? !!! it's because I am Very, Very, Very Happy!

You can't understand it if you haven't lived it, but it sure does feel good to be less of a man when the man I was was more than twice and average man. Yes, I am a little bit sore from using certain muscles again, but it is expected and to say truthfully, it feels kinda good. I still have those days when the food wants to take control, but when I can channel it into something else, whether it is moving or writing, then I am happy. Sometimes the food still wins, but it wins less this week than it did last week.

I'm keeping at it!

Hunger

It is interesting what an American will think of as "hungry" as compared to the rest of the world.

Going to McDonald's and getting a regular fries and a cheeseburger, will leave most Americans feeling "hungry", but give that same meal to a kid from the streets of Buenos Aires and they will feel as if they have just had a banquet. What an American considers a meal for one, the rest of the world ( perhaps with the exception of England or Germany) would consider to be a family size buffett.

It comes up because while I have shed close to 20 pounds, by eating less and moving more, the hardest thing to stop is the after-dinner snacking. Especially when I sit at a desk right next to the kitchen while I am typing this. But I am continuing to remain strong. I had my dinner, a very reasonable one I might add, and now it is nearly 11 pm and my tummy is rumbling. Granted I did a lot of work after I had dinner. Beside walking, I also handled trash ( shop trash, boxes and boxes of it!) and mowed. Still have laundry to finish. Doesn't matter, no more eating after dinner. Holding strong.

I'm not really hungry, I just want to taste something and chew. And swallow. Why? Because my mind is not really occupied, and I am frustrated. But I gave up smoking and I can give this up too. I am tired of being a tub-o-lard, and this is how that finally ends!

Thank you for letting me rant, I will be doing some more from time to time until I have lost at least 100 pounds. Do you realize that by losing 100 pounds, I will still be heavier than my sister and brother combined? I topped out at 355 three weeks ago. Once I get below 275, I hope to never get over it again! It will take work. I'm up for it!!